Valentine's Day and the Armed Forces

There aren't many days in the Church's year that the world celebrates with the church, and apart from Xmas and Easter, and patron saints, saint Valentine is one of those few additional celebrations. Odd then, to the world, or the uninitiated, that it is cyril and Methodias in the calendar of saints - try telling that to your partner. Sorry St Valentine's day is translated...
Celebrate it the world does - with chocolates, champagne, roses, food, perfume, holidays, cars, though prices seem higher than last year and money seems thinner on the ground. Today is not a day to forget a card, nor those seemingly random acts of kindness which make a relationship special.
It's all very well thinking of love as a present experience, rather than an experience remembered, or one anticipated, but bereavement or a breakdown in relationships make today a day tinged by sadness for many. Love lost is painful, and the church tries to support those who have lost their loved one. For those not in a rleationship today can be a day of bitter loneliness or disappointment with unmet expectations.
TV land, with its adverts and lovey-dovey comfort, promotes being in a relationship as the norm, and websites for dating agencies seem to be doing good business, possibly as those who are made more lonely by the season try to find a partner.
Relationships can be good, positive and wholesome, though they can also be destructive and harmful, undermining individuality as they become abusive. This part of being in a relationship is presented on telly quite well, though it is very depressing. But here in church we celebrate all that is good in relationships, whether ones anticipated, experienced in the here and now or remembered.
Think especially and pray for those who are separated by distance, especially members of the armed forces serving in Afghanistan. They miss their loved ones, and both change as they are apart and experience different things. War can change people - think of the film Apocalypse Now 'the first time I spoke to my wife was to ask for a divorce' says the Vietnam war veteran in the film.
Marital breakdown is not inevitable, but relationships are challenged by separation, by being apart. And so as we remember St Valentine let's remember the armed forces who put their lives on the line for us. Pray for chaplains such as Rev David Banbury who try to help TA soldiers and their loved ones cope with change, as they get alongside them, to listen, to talk and to just be there. St Valentine's Day, like birthdays and Xmas is a hard time to be apart, it's a time of loneliness and a time when feelings of attachment separation and loss get all jumbled up together.
Unit morale, supporting other members of the squad, or platoon offers something to replace that loss, and looking out for one another can lead to the ultimate sacrifice which the armed forces are called upon to make - they lay down their lives so that we might live in freedom. Think christ and his love on the cross, and remember those who serve today, and the homeless and mentally ill, many of whom served yesterday and in wars long ago.